Grandma Flo-isms

Today is my grandmother's birthday. I'm fairly certain she's 81, but don't quote me on that. She's pretty colorful for an old broad... one of her coined expressions is "well, shit a brick." (Sometimes she replaces brick with gumdrop. I've never caught on to the reasoning.)

Another fun fact: she has Alzheimer's. Therefore I despise Alzheimer's. Not that I wouldn't despise it otherwise, but something about watching a loved one forget you really ups the ante. She used to call me her "baby grand"... not because I resemble a piano (although maybe I do?), but because I'm the youngest of her grandchildren. The last time I visited she introduced me as her niece. She rarely has those moments, but they're zingers.

Lately I've had a major sweet tooth. I don't allow myself to regularly keep chocolate in the house or I would gain twenty pounds in a heartbeat. (I did make a batch of brownies tonight, but I forgot to spray the pan and I can't get them out. Tragedy? Indeed.) Anyway, I've resorted to grabbing the bag of brown sugar and treating myself to a spoonful. I just realized yesterday that this was a habit that came from my dear old grandma. Whenever I was sick (and I was sick often), she would drive up to take care of me. She let me watch cartoons all day and fed me spoonfuls of brown sugar. Consequently, I didn't recover very quickly.

My favorite Grandma Flo-ism: "Don't do anything you couldn't do upside down a bicycle." She still says this to me every time I leave. Some things never change.